I am a lonely human being, so lonely that, looking at the sun at it’s brightest the light fails to broaden my sight but passes to narrow it only not slightly, to the point it’s not only blinding being that centred but hurts me to hold a glimpse that in the end, instead of baring the pain, to see what will come forth after it subsides I, or my eyes ends up choosing going back to that place the very place, shadows can’t live, or I see smoke that place where where loneliness is skin of my soul, I go to sleep.
Blank. Dark. Pitch
I’m a lonely human being so lonely that, expectations have started placing me on their board games. Soon as my eyes open, I wonder why I betray myself so. But a little further, maybe just a little yet in truth; I’d never want my soul to be without skin.
And maybe in a dream, sadness will not be heart of that soul.
In the name of this fickle emotion called love I will chase you barefoot in my satin gown and hold the coat that was a barrier for me in the cold to tell you, no to emphasise misunderstanding clung to my intentions I was brave in my surprise yet my hesitation or yours but somewhere in between the line I wanted to cross and where you stood there was a curtain and this curtain showed a photograph An old photograph at that Of I when I’d been naive, extremely so Then I’d thought love was the sudden clouds on a sunny day Misguided and disturbing, didn’t belong But that had been before Before I knew the unnoticed have purpose Like wildflowers, they aren’t haunted They’re a sprinkle curiosity to an already exhausted existence. I’ll tell you, minding were we stand and what we hold your impatience, bourn of my ignorance no matter how unrelated could to be a reason, an inkling to turn and face me So I can take your hand, guide you where my heart stand waiting with excited thumping I found you in summer, when I hate colours yet I decorated my days with it’s fragrance to welcome you into my life whilst all is at it’s peak ripe.
The breeze had arrived, on time too; my longing had started to taunt.
It swayed in. Yes.
Let the cruel rain take with it what I’d spend all my founded interest in.
Just when I was about to fall to my knees…
Rustling of leaves first raised my head, I listened closely and they weren’t whispering. I saw how my tears ran where they’d not be found, abandoning their comfortable home.
Then it was the aftermath of that storm I didn’t call. Guards it’d left, weren’t chased, more swept of my surface. I felt my skin tingle, made for sweet revenge.
If I’d befriended butterflies before, I’d call them out and twirl.
But my tears had left abruptly, while my vision was clear, it made me blink corruptedly. Love at first sight…
I was all aware I wanted to be captured By this breeze, how to me it were unmasked hero.
When I breathed in, the cleanse wasn’t mere, it felt reverent. Perhaps the feeling of standing long after being pinned, even my bones opened themselve.
That breeze, from the courtyard to where I stood annihilated my dominant past, each step it took I could see watchful birds flee, the ground moan, but singing of the leaves only persisted though some traitors fell, I thought; perhaps the tyranny rain saw what shade my eyes were, remembered I too had hopes.
When it finally surrounded me, already mesmerized by the massacre, yet insecure of my dependency, it’s touch took me days ahead to a serenaded me, I felt someone finally spoke to me.
I thought of love, feeling of cruising your fingers in cold water, runs through and makes you shiver.
What it means to me…
Leaves showering under heavy rain some fall, some strengthen either come to their destination. Those strengthened, come out brighter. It’s such a situation, I fear I’ll be in. You’ll see me searching with my eyes frantically if misplaced.
I thought of love, Dragon mother housing her eggs till they hatch, then chasing them away.
Is it competitive with nature?
Like a shark being frightening yet a dolphin is with tricks, there never was choice.
Maybe the sun knowing it’s meant for light yet the moon is too. If I’m able to see…
What it means to me…
That dog was only for breeding I’ll leave my mother too, If I died before her?
I hear a song I like I tell you of it and anxiously await your reaction?
These complications but affairs are never bland.
I thought of love, the strike of lightning you might admire will have me clinging to you.
If I’m ecstatic hearing my name from your lips, but it’s mispronounced and I’m childish it nags, is a lion to be timid?
I was to water a plant gently, in my excitement overlooked, then am I unfeeling?
This love, what it means to me…
The nest you built for us, and we found I was allergic.
Sometimes it’s like this, I know apples are from a tree, they’re picked and they fall But, when it’s starring me in the eye; the phenomenon is the same as lightning lighting up a tree. My mind, rigid thing will only allow; good morning to keep it’s simplicity yet I love you is January to December, has to come with ledgers and certificates, could never – can never keep it’s simplicity; meaning I love you, what other intentions could there be? But; it will forever be attached to, “How come this exists?” …I get conflicted.
Before long and not knowing how or where it began, you started making me smile. I can’t honestly say it wasn’t romantically based but I know it was something I looked forward to. I became greedy and unsatisfied by what I allowed myself to be immersed in, because I found someone I was not envious of, someone I felt neither inferior nor superior to, someone who made me wish to delve the depths of their mind, know the inner workings of their thoughts and most importantly; someone who kept me content with only myself.
Romance tends to sour, Love tends to fade, I wanted you to be my family.
My lover was leaving,
packed what I'd become in a suitcase
I'd carry whenever I went to my next pursuit.
After he was gone,
I stood by the door
with my thoughts scurrying
I stood by our bed
my thoughts still scurrying
finally I stood by the mirror,
full length mirror and
I found I wasn't stripped naked
instead I had on a snow furthered gown
If ignorant, as I always leaned to
it seemed I were a queen...
What does it say for my heartache?